Tuesday, July 24, 2012

Big Changes #3 - Residential Treatment

Brad and I have wondered on and off about the necessity for a more intensive treatment option for Kishawn.  Although he has made lots of ground and has worked hard on getting through his challenges there are some challenged that continue to elude all the effort of him and all those around him trying to help him.  To protect Kishawn, I will leave out the details.

For the last several months we have had several of the professionals that have been working with our family strongly recommend residential treatment for him.  We were both initially shocked and in denial about this recommendation and didn't follow through with their advise.  However, as time went on we too began to see how such a program could be beneficial for him and the other members of the family, and even more we wondered what would happen in the future if he did not receive this treatment.

How it all came together was miraculous.  There definitely was Divine Intervention in the whole process.  Last Thursday I received a phone call from Arizona adoption subsidy within minutes of their review board telling us that they approved part of the funding for the school that the facility has on campus.  We would be expected to pay the remainder of the the fee.  In total we would be coming out of pocket over $1,000 a month.  South Dakota Medicaid was scheduled to review the case the next coming Monday and they were going to let me know the results that following Wednesday.  So, I was surprised to receive a phone call that same Thursday (4 days before the review board was scheduled to meet) telling me that they approved treatment for Kishawn.  I then called down to the residential facility to tell them what I had heard.  She told me that it would be a bothersome process for them to set up the contracts with the State of Arizona and with our family for the educational funding payments and that she was going to look into a scholarship for Kishawn.  (In the past, I was told it is incredibly difficult to receive the scholarship as they only have one available, there is a waiting list for it, and it doesn't come available until the child who is currently using it is discharged.)  She called me back a mere 15 minutes later telling me that my timing was impeccable, he got the scholarship and that they had immediate openings for admission.  She called me the next day, telling me that he would be admitted next Wednesday.  (That's tomorrow morning.)

This has been a heart-wrenching journey for us.  Many tears have been shed and are still being shed.  Although I can see that it will probably be for the best, I feel so sad about losing one of my children for a time.  We will still have contact with him.  The facility is 45 minutes from our house so there will be regular visits and Brad and I will be heavily involved in his therapy sessions.

I hope and pray that Kishawn will open up and allow himself to address those difficult issues he still struggles with.  Our ultimate goal is the health and safety of all of our children.  Currently, we constantly worry about the safety of everyone in our home both physically and emotionally.  I need to be constantly on guard and vigilant of everyone's actions in order to ensure that nothing detrimental is happening.  Sometimes I miss things and then have to help repair what was damaged.  I worry about the kind of childhood my younger children are having and hope it is not scarring them too badly.  As hard as this decision has been and as terribly difficult as it will be tomorrow as Brad and I drop our son off into the hands of other people, I do feel it will be good for every member of our family, especially Kishawn's biological sisters.

I hope that the unhealthy, dysfunctional relationship of the biological sibling group will be able to begin to heal as they are separated from each other for a time and given some breathing room to all work individually on their own traumas and other things holding them back from further progression.

I would greatly appreciate prayers for Kishawn and all of the other members of our family during this time.  I know that He can work miracles and I know that He will.

1 comment:

Morris Mama said...

We will be praying for Kishawn and everyone else in your family! You guys are wonderful parents and I know that the Lord can heal.