Monday, December 13, 2010

And the verdict is...

After an extremely difficult week with the kids, I have realized once again the benefits of their medication way outweigh how detrimental it is for the kids and our family to not use it right now. 

After a few days of watching them slide down hill rapidly, I felt that I was doing them a huge disservice by not allowing them to use this tool that has proven to help them so much.  Not to mention, I was beginning to feel that I couldn't go on, and that's the last thing my kids need is a mother who cannot be there or them.

I am still using the natural supplements to ensure that their bodies are getting what they need.  I am still doing the therapeutic parenting.  I am still trying to learn more and better strategies to help them at every opportunity I get.  We are still processing grief. 

And I have come to realize that just like the therapists, parents and doctors said (sometimes I prefer to learn things the hard way...) this is a tool that our family needs right now. 

Thank you everyone who gave me advise.  It really meant a lot to me and I did take it to heart.

6 comments:

coffeemom said...

It's one step at a time. Even w the best tools... Cathedrals took many decades to build. Perseverance is one of the great underrated virtues. Things will get better and in the meantime there really is worth and even beauty in the chaos and even in the suffering (bc it transforms. Not bc it us intrinsically good. It's not. But good can grow from it)
Hang in there!! Doing a good job!

hkfarnsworth said...

so today my friend says to me for a project.. i found this amazing blog. and its about this woman who adopted 4 children with emotional and behavior disorders(we are in a special ed class together me and this girl). and she is lds and its just amazing so i used her blog on our project. ... i was like ummm whats that girls name???? haha.. she said some porter girl ill give you the address if you want... and i was like umm... actually no need. THATS MY COUSIN and yes she is amazing! ... pretty much your being stalked but in a good way. and i thought you would enjoy hearing that. small world. lol love you heather! so excited your prego again!

Jack and Lauri Erekson said...

Hi Heather ♥
You are an amazing mom! You have your hands full, but you keep plugging along. I have been on medication for anxiety for many years and I truly can't see a point in my life where I won't take something. For me, I need the chemicals in my body balanced and it takes medication for that to happen. It is really important to take the medication every day at a similar time (it doesn't need to be the exact time, but within a few hour period). My need for medication doesn't change as stressful situations in my life come and go. You may find with your kids that once they deal with things they won't need as high of a dose or anything at all, but if that never happens that is okay too. If I was diabetic I would obviously need insulin and I have a chemical imbalance in my brain that needs to be treated just as diabetes would. Do you remember Melvina Allen? Heather Allen Benson's mom. I remember her sharing her testimony many times and expressing her gratitude for the advances in medical technology. I feel the same! I was at a point, many, many years ago that I felt like I was in a pit and I needed the medication to be able to get out of it. When you are experiencing depression, anxiety, rage, etc., it is very, very difficult to feel the spirit. I hope these thoughts help. You are a great girl! Your little girl is adorable too! Love, Lauri Parker Erekson

ShopHotPinkDiaries said...

love you heather!! xoxo

Kayla and Samuel said...

Hi Heather, after reading your latest posts, I think Brad is right. While I don't even pretend to know what it's like to deal with traumatized kids, I think you are being a bit to hard on yourself. I think you are doing an AMAZING job with your family and you are turning to the greatest "expert" there is, He knows these sweet spirits and how best to help them; which you are. Just look at the letter from Kishawn. Don't forget, one of Satan's greatest weapons is discouragement, I'm sure you know that but sometimes it's good to be reminded. Don't let him get you down, keep up the great work you are doing!

Jillian and Crew said...

What supplements do guys use? You can email me if that is private and you are comfortable sharing with me but not blogging. We are researching some now...our "Vivace" recently started back on meds...we had been able to gradually go off them for several months...but with daddy's upcoming deployment...we are back on them to cut back on the aggression and anger.
I know it is so hard to find the right balance and know what to do...I always say talk to everyone on "every side" of it and then decided what works for your family specifically, it might be a mixture.