Saturday, May 15, 2010

Why I homeschool...

When I began to home school the kids, I had several reasons for doing it.  Such as...
  • Take them out of situations that were guaranteed to be overwhelming for them,
  • Lessen the amount of stimulation they were getting,
  • Reducing the opportunities they had to do things that would be harmful to their healing,
  • Make up for the nurturing time they lost as younger children,
  • Give them a strong foundation from which to build
Because the school environment was way more than they could handle, although they are smart kids, they struggled a LOT academically.  I didn't know much about homeschooling.  I didn't even know where to start or how to begin, but I followed my gut feeling knowing that it would be the best thing for them.  I figured they weren't learning much at school anyway.   Even if I didn't teach them everything the schools were trying to teach them, they would be getting something much more valuable than a school could offer hurting children.  They'd be learning to accept the love of a mother and a family.  They'd learn what love and safety feel like.  They could learn what so many children who are raised in loving homes learn naturally.  They could learn to feel safe in this world by first feeling safe at home.

Love and closeness was once very threatening to these kids.  They ran from it, became to 'hyper' to be able to avoid it, raged away from it, made themselves smell to keep people away, etc.  So naturally they did not like the idea of being home.  At the beginning I often heard from them that they wanted to go back to school.

Although I try to give them a broad knowledge of many things, my main focus with my children is not arithmatic, geography, or writing.  My main focus it to bring out their spirits; who they are meant to be.  Until recently their true selves have been hidden under their pain, anger, hate, and various traumas.  I think that I am finally seeing my children for who they really are instead of what their traumas brought out in them.

I am so touched by watching them play together, instead of reliving traumatic events together.
I love to see the concern in their eyes for another person's pain.
I feel so grateful each time one of them sees someone's need and helps selflessly.
I love to see the loving relationships that are being built in our home.
I think it is so adorable that Jazmine can comfort Makenzie almost as well as I can.
My spirit smiled when Jada, on her own, opened and closed the door for a person hauling new flooring into our house, then tried to help him carry everything downstairs.

Tears came to my eyes when, as we drove past their former school, my boy said, "I liked going to school, but I like being homeschooled more 'cause then we get to be with our mom all day.  That's pretty awesome."

When I get the question now, what do I say?

Why do I homeschool?

I homeschool my kids because I LOVE to spend every minute of each day with them.  I love watching them become who they are supposed to be.  I would miss them WAY too much if I didn't get to spend all day every day with them.