Saturday, February 27, 2010

Houseguest - attachment therapist

This week we were so blessed to have one of the LEADING attachment therapist in the country stay at our house!

Deborah Hage and her husband have 2 birth children, 7 adopted children and were therapeutic foster parents to 5 children.  She is now one of the most well known attachment therapists and our family got to have her undivided attention for 3 days!

(Kiana, Me, Deborah, Jada, Jazmine, Kishawn)

It was an amazing experience having her in our home doing trauma work with the kids and helping Brad and I fine tune our therapeutic parenting skills. 

The trauma work she did with the kids was awesome.  Finally they were able to get all of the "skeletons in their closets" out.  The secrets that held onto, that eat them up inside were taken out into the open analyzed, discussed and now are not nearly as terrorizing as they were.  It grieves my heart to know the horrors they have experienced.  I even learned of more of the traumas they have been through.  Through it all though, I felt strengthened and lifted up by unseens hands.  I know that my Heavenly Father is looking out for us!

Therapeutic parenting is NOT natural instinctive parenting.  It is geared toward helping traumatized children feel safe in their environment, with us their parents, and in control of themselves.  It is VERY difficult parenting to do, BUT the most loving kind of parenting there is for traumatized kids.  For our family, it means ABSOLUTE STRUCTURE.  I can almost guarantee that the amount of structure we must have within our home cannot be understood without seeing it in action.  With it, the kids can grow, heal and thrive.  Without it?  Catastrophe.

I have to say that I feel that, with Deborah, every cent of what we paid to have her come was worth it.  She stayed up at night brainstorming ideas to help our unique family.  Every fiber of her being was focused on helping us.  I feel like I got a HUGE second wind to keep me moving forward.  HUGE progress was made with the kids as well.

I cannot begin to explain what it means to have support like Deborah.  So Deb, if you're reading this thank you from the bottom of my heart for the precious gift you have given our family this week!  We look forward to working with you again and again!!

1 comment:

Janalie said...

Wow what an opportunity! You are so amazing. I love reading your blog and finding my own inner strength through your tremendous efforts!